


Do We Simply Stare at What's Horrible and Forgive It?

by orphan_account



Series: The Landscape After Cruelty [2]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode V: Empire Strikes Back, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Dark, Angst, Dark Jedi - Freeform, Force Bond (Star Wars), Hurt/Comfort, Leia is a Jedi, Luke is not, M/M, Mind Meld
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-14
Updated: 2016-09-14
Packaged: 2018-08-14 23:20:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8032951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Wrecked with emotional trauma, Luke followed his father after their duel in Cloud City, renouncing his title as a Jedi and Rebel--but unable to renounce his love for Wedge. After Vader's death, Palpatine's disappearance, and the completion of the second Death Star, Wedge flew as Leia's pilot in a mission to stop Luke once and for all; but neither man can stand by their respective sides in the face of their insurmountable bond.





	Do We Simply Stare at What's Horrible and Forgive It?

**Author's Note:**

> An AU set during what would have been ROTJ, wherein Luke joins Vader after Bespin in ESB. Vader dies of sickness soon after, and Palpatine is forced to abandon his goals while Luke takes over his father's helm. Luke is not so much a Sith Lord, but a Fallen, or "Dark," Jedi (http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Dark_jedi). After he defected, Leia learned the ways of the Force, since she is the only one who can stop him. However, Luke and Wedge's bond, developed in the years preceding ROTJ, remains intact--and complicates Wedge and Leia's mission to kill Luke. 
> 
> I kept the ending open, though I may return to this concept. Let me know what you think!

Leia froze at the entrance of the chamber, shoulders tersely held back, right hand quivering over the hilt of her lightsaber. Behind her, Wedge’s stomach dropped and he tightened his grip on his blaster reflexively.

Backed by swathes of red and green light from the starfighter dogfight outside, Luke Skywalker lowered the hood of his black robe. His expression remained impassive, emotionless, so terribly unlike the optimistic Tatooine farmboy who saved the galaxy. Wedge’s heart seized in his chest. Leia balled her hands into fists and strode forward, her white fatigues caked with blood and grime.

“Leia,” Luke greeted.

Brother and sister stared at each other wordlessly, until Luke glanced at Wedge still standing in the doorway. The pilot straightened determinedly. Luke’s mouth quirked in amusement. Wedge grit his teeth.

Luke stepped down from the raised platform at the head of the chamber. He opened his mouth to speak, but Leia dodged the theatrics. “This is your last chance, Luke,” she declared. “Vader is dead.”

Wedge closely examined Luke’s minute frown at the mention of his late mentor. “Our father is dead,” he corrected.

Leia seethed. “Bail Organa was my father!”

“You’ve never known that void, Princess,” Luke snapped, “and you have no right to the knowledge of the Force.”

The blade of Leia’s saber activated with a deafening hiss. Purple light bathed Luke’s disapproving face and the hum of the lightsaber rang throughout the chamber.

“My brother was a Jedi,” Leia said. “I’m doing this for you, Luke!”

Luke peeled off his leather gloves and let them drop to the floor, then shed his robe to reveal a black tunic. Two lightsabers were clipped to his belt: his own silver and gold hilt, and Vader’s silver and black. Leia shifted to an offensive stance; Wedge eyed Luke’s skeletal, robotic hand, then cocked his blaster.

Luke halted and sought Wedge’s eyes over Leia’s shoulder. Equal waves of unbidden rage and grief pummeled Wedge through the mental link which still thrummed unbroken. Untalented in the Force, Wedge fumbled backward down the emotions’ path, seeking Luke’s mind.

He gasped as a series of thoughts lodged into his own mind: the violet clash of Luke’s blue saber with Vader’s red on Bespin; Luke’s angry, cauterized wound where his hand used to be; Vader’s soothing words— _My son, you’ve always been contained, misunderstood, then forgotten_ ; two people Wedge immediately knew were Luke’s aunt and uncle, forever bound to their sad sands; Biggs Darklighter’s smile, then his exploding X-wing; Wedge in Echo Base as seen from Luke’s eyes, so smart yet humble, brave yet vulnerable, a mirage blanketing Luke from blizzard winds; Ben Kenobi and Yoda exploiting Luke to appease their own grief and regret; Vader again, his possessive love poisoning Luke’s compassion, the memory of Luke’s mother underneath every dark shadow...

Finally, Wedge stood before Luke on an anonymous planet, knuckles bruised by Luke’s broken nose, a blaster pointed at Luke’s chest, separating them—Wedge, who Luke would protect at any cost, through any means, who couldn’t understand him, just as his mother never understood his father, a testament to the passage of black, bitter love—Wedge, who was unable to pull the trigger, screaming at Luke to leave, to never speak to him again. And then the night ending with a biting kiss, a promise to mask Luke’s presence in hyperspace, just go, just go away and never come back—

In the chamber, Wedge staggered forward, his blaster clattering to the ground. Leia turned her head, unwilling to show her back to her brother, who stepped back himself.

“Luke,” Wedge said, regaining himself, straightening, and Luke stared at him fearfully, face ashen.

“How?” Luke asked. “What did you do?”

“I’m sorry—”

Leia barred Wedge from moving forward. “What happened?” she demanded. “What did you do to him?” she asked Luke.

Luke shook his head, and Wedge suddenly saw the young man crushed underneath the weight of his father’s decisions and his mother’s ghost. Locks of hair fell across Luke’s forehead, one strand caught by his eyelashes. Outside, starfighters continued to fire and implode. Luke blinked; the strand of hair fell away.

“Luke,” Wedge repeated.

“Stop!”

Luke snarled and gripped his two lightsabers, Vader’s in his prosthetic and his own in his flesh hand. They blazed to life and halved his body with light parallel to the storm of lasers behind him.

Leia threw Wedge behind her with a wave of invisible energy, then raised her saber to parry Luke’s doubly-forceful downward strike. Wedge dove for his blaster while the siblings battled. He struggled to find the way back into Luke’s mind, but Luke blocked the intrusion—then faltered in his step.

Leia shrieked with rage and lifted her saber above her head, brought it down in an arc across Luke’s prosthetic. The blade of light easily cut through the synthetic wires and steel.Vader’s lightsaber detracted and skated in Wedge’s direction.

Luke recovered quickly, forced Leia to block a high attack, then kicked her in the stomach and slashed her chest. She screamed and fell to the ground while Luke moved to his father’s weapon, but Wedge snatched it up. The hilt felt heavy and gross in his hand; he resisted the urge to release it. Luke stood before him, disheveled, his wrist sparking dangerously.

“Give it to me, Wedge,” he demanded.

“We can make this right,” Wedge insisted. “ _I_ can make this right. I didn’t understand before. I do now.”

Luke narrowed his eyes. His green blade gleamed ominously, but he did not wield against Wedge as he had against his own sister. “Don’t lie to me.”

“I wouldn’t. We may have disagreed, but I would never lie to you...” Wedge took a step forward and gestured to Luke’s own lightsaber. “You can’t keep both. You have to choose, and I know you can find it in yourself to make the right choice.”

“Get away from him, Wedge!” Leia ordered, struggling to a slow crawl. The fabric of her fatigues seemed to have melted into the skin on her chest, bleeding into the singed gash Luke had left across her sternum. Her lightsaber was yards away; she did not reach for it, instead defaulting to what remained her strongest weapon: speech. “He’s not the same! Luke died, just like his father. There was nothing left of Anakin in Vader—and there’s nothing left of Luke now!”

“That’s not true!” Luke whirled toward her. “You never knew him. Don’t claim to understand a man you refuse to accept as your father. I saw him in his last moments! I am the only person alive who understands what he was!”

“I saw,” Wedge informed. Luke looked at him, angry tears threatening to fall. Wedge stepped toward him. “I saw your memories. What you tried to tell me that night—I saw it. I don’t know how. But I know what your father did for your mother, and what he’s done for you, and—and what you’ve done for me.”

Wedge dropped his blaster and Vader’s lightsaber. Luke did not move as Wedge expected, his gaze locked onto Wedge’s eyes—immovable, frightened, waiting.

Wedge lowered himself to his knees at Luke’s feet.

“Wedge!” Leia desperately repeated his name. Wedge ignored her.

“Use the Force,” Wedge told Luke. “Show me. You don’t have to carry this burden alone.”

Luke’s saber vibrated mere inches from his side; if inclined, he could barely move his arm to sever Wedge’s head. “I am always alone.”

“When Biggs died, I abandoned my post,” Wedge said. “When you didn’t make it to the rendezvous after Hoth, I told myself you were fine. When you risked everything that night and came to me for help, I turned you away.” He lifted his chin in a show of surrender. “Do what you want. I’m not leaving. Never again.”

Luke hesitated.

It was all it took for Leia to outstretch her hand, wrench his and Vader’s lightsaber toward her prone form, and force Luke to freeze, his body locking in an imitation of rigor mortis. Luke fell, seizing as if battling Leia’s power.

Wedge pulled Luke into his lap by the lapel of his tunic.

“Let him go!” Leia roared. “Wedge, you are acting against the orders of the Alliance! Do not make yourself an enemy!”

“Fight her,” Wedge shouted. He knew Leia bested Luke in terms of emotional brutality—had seen it himself—but also knew Luke contained more technique and skill, if he could find the stability to hone it. Wedge’s hands roamed the side of Luke’s face; his fingers tangled in Luke’s hair. “Luke, you are stronger than her, I know you are. I’m here. Don’t give up. I’m going to keep you safe.”

Luke’s tremors suddenly abated, and his blue eyes brightened; the rainstorm had finally cleared.

Wedge fumbled for his blaster where it had fallen near them and pointed it at Leia, his other hand wrapped protectively around Luke’s shoulders. “I don’t want to kill you,” he said.

Leia scowled, struggling to compose her fury. “Neither do I.”

Luke sat up, slumped against Wedge’s chest, and lifted his hand. Leia’s face fell slack and white.

“You will not kill him,” he ordered. “You will let us leave. Once we are gone, you will depart in a TIE fighter and give the order to destroy the Death Star. You will tell everyone Wedge Antilles died in killing me.”

Leia repeated the commands with a robotic voice. Luke dropped his arm and shut his eyes.

“Are you alright?” Wedge gently asked.

“Yes.” Luke stood. He staggered toward Leia and clipped the two lightsabers onto his belt. “Where’s your X-wing?”

Wedge rushed to his feet and returned his blaster to its holster. “Follow me.”

They proceeded wordlessly. Luke did not stop to take any personal items. In the hangar, he climbed into the cockpit and sat behind the pilot’s seat. R2-D2, whom Wedge had adopted upon Luke’s betrayal, whirred to life in the astromech port.

“Yes, I’m back,” Luke confirmed wryly as Wedge strapped in.

“Where are we going?” Wedge asked.

“Head to the Outer Rim. Artoo can scatter our location.” Luke lifted his hand to his temple. “Hurry. I can only make us unnoticeable for a few moments.”

It was then Wedge realized he was actively forfeiting his position as Red Leader, the Alliance, and current life. “Right.”

They did not wait to see Leia leave or give her command, entering hyperspace once they cleared the dogfight. Wedge left the controls to Artoo and turned. Luke was sandwiched in the back of the cockpit, face scrunched in pain and exhaustion.

His tears began to fall freely.

Wedge ached to touch Luke, so he did. Luke flinched, then melted into the embrace.

Their wounds had not been healed. They would live in hiding now as dead men. Palpatine was still out there, waiting to regain foothold. Leia could possibly realize she’d been manipulated, and start a search. Yet they could strategize, argue, and worry later.

For it was the first time each man understood the other completely. Nothing had to be said.

 

 


End file.
